The Best Laid Plans...

As previously noted, it's been kind of a slow year so far. So, determined after my trip to Zambia to get things going, I texted the Penguin and arranged for an outing. He was a little slow to respond--apparently, there are limits to how much you can neglect a guy before he loses interest (I can't say I wasn't warned, seeing as how that was one of the first things the Penguin told me on our second date).

But, after a modicum of effort, I was able to worm my way back into the Penguin's good graces, and he agreed to a Saturday date to the Spy Museum. Squinched between brunch with a friend and a Saturday night performance with my band, I didn't actually have a huge amount of time for the date. So, I experienced a little chagrin when we got to the Spy Museum and there was a block-long line to get in. We opted to forego the espionage for another outing (the Penguin has been to the Spy Museum, so he didn't mind, but I was pretty disappointed). Lucky Strike proved to be a misnomer, as we found out that there was a two hour wait to get a lane. So, thus disenfranchised, we wandered around Chinatown looking for something to do.

Our walk was limited, by the way, by the Penguin's shoes, which were apparently not made for walking. HA!!! Since when are the BOY's shoes the limiting factor!?!!? The Penguin expressed disappointment, by the way, that his boots did not have spurs, which I thought was funny because he didn't actually know what spurs are for ("fashion?" he said).

So, instead, we found a fortune teller and had our tarot read. The Penguin went first, and I played with the puppy in the hall (aptly named Sugar). Then it was my turn. The woman did a tarot reading with which I'm unfamiliar (I'm not actually up on all the ways to read tarot card--it's not so much my thing, generally). She told me that my childhood was pleasant and that my family is supportive of what I do--true. She said that I've already found my true love, and that he's surrounded by evil. Okay, Mattie's definitely the love of my life, and he's definitely surrounded by evil. She then said that she thought that the "gentleman outside" was the love of my life because he's my "twin flame soul mate," which I thought was HYSTERICAL. I mean, honestly--we're on date #4!!!! The love of my life??? Yes, that is what I would tell him if I wanted to get rid of him quickly.

In any case, she went on with her prediction--I will get married in the next two years and have children (by the way, I remember when I had my runes read once, and the guy said that I would receive a proposal for marriage in the next 6 months or something, and it was true except that the fortune teller neglected to tell me that I wouldn't like the guy making the offer), and that my job involves travel--well, she got that right, at least! She also, by the way, offered a more in-depth service to figure out what the evil is that's plaguing the Penguin. He thought that a 3 hour trance, which was the service she offered, would obviously make the evil go away because I would get bored and leave.

Afterwards, we went to the National Portrait Gallery and made out in the stairwell for an hour. Because I've graduated from high school. And I've found my twin-flame soul mate.

Like Molasses in Winter

Okay, so it has not escaped my attention that we're close to V-Day (or, as Mormon #1 likes to call it, Singles Awareness Day) and I actually have not gone on a date this year. It's been a slow year so far--so much for my horoscope. I'm pretty sure I was supposed to have a good year.

Noting my particular lack of engaging activities with the opposite sex, I went to a breast cancer fund raiser last night, fully prepared to buy a date at the auction. Yes, I know that I'm cute enough that I shouldn't have to buy my date, but really--I've never won a date at an auction. I thought it would be fun.

Except that it's EXPENSIVE!!! I thought I'd be willing to put out about $50, maybe a little bit more. The cheapest guy went for, I think, $65. The most expensive was $150! Can you imagine that!?! I guess this is what it means to be in DC with such a ridiculous ratio. In other news, I put together small group dinners for church, where every party had 2 guys and 4 women. Except for the 1 party that had no women. Wow. Kind of a rough town, I guess.

I will be going out with the Penguin on Saturday. This will be date #4 (it's only taken 3 months to get there); we'll see how it goes!